Crocs linked with Larry Craig scandal, plus Amber Roberson strikes back

According to THIS clip from the Daily Show, "If [someone is] wearing Crocs, they are soliciting incredibly depraved gay sex." The Daily Show is America's finest news source. You take it up with them.

And here is a photograph of a hero wearing an IHATECROCS shirt.


Moving on.

The first thing I do after waking up in the morning is I check my email. This is just what I do. I check my email constantly. Compulsively. And I recently got an iPod Touch, which makes all that even easier. Now, I can check my email while waiting for the bus, presuming there is unprotected WiFi somewhere nearby and usually, there is. Anyway, it is awesome.

Today, we got an email from Amber Roberson. Her subject line was "yup, it's me again" and so I searched her name my email archive to figure out who exactly she was and why I was expected to remember her. Apparently she sent us the following messages a while back:

T1: Amber Roberson, tree-hugger

I think you gives are pretty dumb. You are NEVER going to, in a MILLION years, stop the Crocs craze. Sure there ugly. THEY LOOK LIKE CLOWN SHOES!!! But they are comfortable. And they can withstand a good hosedown. AND they are fungus-resistant. And anyone dumb enough to wear them on an escalator will pay the price. THIS SITE IS A WASTE OF TIME, EFFORT, AND INTERNET SPACE!!!! you should be ashamed, sapping people for their money. FOR YOURSELVE!!!!!!Go donate to Greenpeace. In the meantime, I think I will go hug a tree. You probably won't post this, but if you do, I just know you will make fun of me. BAH HUMBUG ON YOU!!!!

T1: Amber Roberson, registered Tree-hugger

I hear you hate Crocs,huh?
WELL, I HATE YOU WITH A PASSION THAT BURNS THROUGH MY SOUL, WISHING TO KILL YOU ALL!!!! you freaks. You will never stop Crocs. Sure, they can be dangerous. Sure they're ugly. But apparantly 6MILLION+ people don't care. they are comfortable. They are washable. They are fungus resistant. Well, I AM YOU!!! RESISTANT. YOU ARE FIGHTING A LOST CAUSE!!!!
YOU MONEY hogging bimbos!!! GO DONATE TO A REAL CAUSE!!! while you do that, i will go hug a tree.

T1: Amber R. , registered tree-hugger and promoter of Greenpeace

you guys are insane. Just who do you think you are? You hurt me. I am now tired of looking at the address. I have decided to block you guys of my computer list. Oh, yep, it's me again!!!! Amber R.

After figuring out who she was, I got excited for her next crazy nonsensical rant. The following is what she sent us after a silence that lasted months.

Oh, yes- it's me. The grammar-freak. The tree-hugger. Back for more. WHY can you useless people use the time the dear Lord has given you? WHY can't you go volunteer at an animal shelter? NO. Instead, you devote your lives to scamming people, making fun of FOOTWEAR. Sure, they are ugly. But wouldn't you be better off doing something that ISN'T completely worthless? You should be ASHAMED. But no. You go on, smiling. Throwing them into blenders. Cutting them. Yawn. Goodness. YOU MAKE ME SICK. Thank you for BOTHERING to read this. This is the last time I will waste my precious time on earth trying to convince TOTAL NUT JOBS to stop. My tirade is over. Oh, and P.S.- even if you tried to contact me, this is my JUNK EMAIL. Go do the world a favor and see a psychiatrist. And, it might surprise you to learn my age, which is why I won't tell you. Wonder Forevermore!

UN-Cordially Yours,
Amber Roberson, Tree-hugger

She's such a wacky character. Her atrocious English has gotten better. I hope she didn't strain herself too much. She'll be sorely missed. Assuming she doesn't forget to take her meds again and emails us again with another crazy tirade in a couple months. Also, in case you wondered, we rarely respond to emails, positive or otherwise. The volume is such that it would exceeds the amount of time I'm willing to set aside for this website. An email has to be pretty substantive to warrant response. Amber has yet to be replied to.

I also find it curious that she thinks my interest will be piqued by her saying she won't tell me her age. Why in God's name would I care? I scarcely care to know the ages of my closest friends. Why would I want to know the age of some crazy stranger who I hope never to meet in real life because I doubt I could stand the overwhelming stench of cat urine I imagine she is steeped in? We wish Amber the best in her future pursuits.

baltimore sun article

The following are the bits of the Baltimore Sun article in which IHATECROCS is written about. We took up quite a bit more space in the article than I had anticipated. Also, she misspelled Kate's last name. But, I am quite pleased that this is the first time that a journalist has mentioned Matt's name. I've been telling that anecdote for every single interview and finally Matt's name got in.

A young woman waits demurely in a stark room. Before her on a table sit scissors and one half of a pair of Crocs.

For the next two minutes and 35 seconds, as a jaunty Cole Porter score plays, she takes scissors to shoe, shredding the rubbery yellow thing into sad little slivers. The slivers she pulverizes in a blender.

A smile never leaves her face.

The dismemberment, enjoyed by more then 60,000 people on YouTube, comes compliments of the folks behind Ihatecrocs.com, an Internet site dedicated to the elimination of Crocs and those who think that their excuses for wearing them are viable.

Though that mission is failing miserably -- sales of the pliable, holey, cloggish Crocs are as relentless as their fans evangelistic -- Crocs haters remain convinced of the shoe's in-your-face obnoxiousness. They want to cut them to pieces, burn them and feed them to woodchippers.

Woodchippers?

***

"They repulse me," says Vincenzo Ravina, who founded Ihatecrocs.com with his friend Kate Leth, the happy snipper. "They are to your eyes what secondhand smoke is to your lungs."

Cancerous?

Ravina's Web site tops 1,000 hits a day.

His products -- including the $17 T-shirt with the slogan "Friends Don't Let Friends Wear Crocs" -- have found devotees internationally.

***

Like many haters, ihatecrocs.com founder Vincenzo's aversion grew from feelings of helplessness -- he felt as if he had lost control.

One day "the weird kid" in class showed up with Crocs. Vincenzo snickered disparagingly with his friend, Matt. Two weeks later, Matt got a pair.

"And his girlfriend. And all my other friends," the Canadian college sophomore says. "I'm looking around and going, 'What's changed?'"

***

All Vincenzo knows for sure is that he'd love to stick a few pairs in a woodchipper -- if only it weren't so expensive to rent one.

Instead he's chewing over the idea of laying a Croc or two on the tracks before a speeding train.

"Like Snidely Whiplash," he says with undeniable enthusiasm.

In the meantime, he promises not to slip, like so many others, over to the Croc side. Even if they are anti-bacterial. Even if they do come in lavender. Even if they are as comfortable as people say.

"The comfort level required to overlook their extreme ugliness would have to be amazing," he says. "They would have to be like walking on a cloud."

Full article is HERE.

Also, we got an email in reference to the article that incensed me a bit. Here is the email and my subsequent response:

I just read the interview in the Baltimore Sun and then went to your website.

Wow... you guys are HARD-CORE!! If you guys focused your efforts on world hunger, everyone on the planet would have three square meals a day! Too bad you're obsessed with plastic shoes.

Maybe you should learn a trade instead of trying to call yourself a journalist. If all you can focus on is plastic shoes, then you'll be penniless soon.

Who's next - Nike, Adidas, Puma, Birkenstocks??

Best,
Scott in MD


Dear Scott in MD,

Precisely what do you mean by "trying to call [myself] a journalist"? I mean, I go to a school of journalism, I'm in the Honours program, I've written quite a few articles and I've been published a few times. I take notes constantly and I interview people. Now look up the word "journalism" and then the word "journalist".

Also, I can focus on more than plastic shoes. It just so happens that you visited the site of mine that is all to do with plastic shoes. Perhaps if you were to explore my personal website, you'd get a better idea of my varied focuses. As to your comment that I'll be penniless soon as a result of said focus on plastic shoes, I highly doubt it, as most of my income comes from, you know, working.

As a journalist, I absolutely hate errors of fact. I can't stand when people don't do their research properly. It is so easy. We live in an information age. Use Google. Please write back with more valid arguments or at least better researched ones and then we'll talk. And I do hope that you write back, honestly.

-Vincenzo

I'll keep you posted on his response.

Friends don't let friends wear Crocs

I just spent a good half hour on the telephone with a reporter from the Baltimore Sun. That was the best interview I've ever given. I'm far more comfortable with these things, now. It saddens me that even though the reporter and I had a good conversation and even talked about journalism and writing (the focus of my university studies) for a while, the only quote that will make it into the article probably will be, "Crocs are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs." It's a good quote, don't get me wrong. It is why I make a point of saying it in each interview. As a journalist, I know that that quote is the best most succinct way of giving our position in a clever way. It's just that for such a long interview to boiled down so much, it feels like a lot of material was wasted. But this is the way of journalism. It is the iceberg effect. The article is the part of the iceberg protruding above the water. The larger part of the iceberg represents all the work and research and time. She also asked me what other things I hate and I was able to go on at length about Dan Brown. He's such a bad writer.

Anyway. I'm rambling. This isn't my personal website. My personal website is way over here.

Check it out, guys! More pictures:


The pictures in this post are from the lovely Jen of Swindon, England! She says:

I love my t-shirt!!! Wore it out for a meal and drinks and so many people agreed with me!

Thank you so much for providing us with such wonderful pieces of art! :oD And such a great price too.

If you'd like to own your very own t-shirt, you can find them available for purchase in the SHOP.

Also, we recently got an email from an Italian lawyer who claims that Crocs infringe on a patent held by his clients:

I'm an Italian lawyer that represent an Italian company, First Company srl, who produces moulds for footwear.

I write the present one to give you the news I've started a legal action against Crocs Inc. for an illicit imitation of patent.

My client has became owner of the following patent (you can verify on the web):

US 6,439,536 B1 - date of patent: Aug. 27, 2002;

EP 1025970 A2 - date of patent: Aug. 9, 2000.

The above patents concern a new mould for the production of footwears - with side openings - in plastic material called EVA.

The footwears sold with mark Crocs, in particulary the clog type Cayman, are manufactured through the use of an identical mould like the one who has been patented by Gatti & Piccolo srl, and now of ownership of my client.

Well, how about that. I wonder if their claims have any legal basis. Moving on...

Actually that's it. Oh, our Facebook group has hit 800 members. Until next time, keep Croc-blocking.