Increased sales for Crocs interview

After many years of inspiring love and hate in consumers, last year the company turned $1bn in sales. Would love to get your take on this.

I'm dismayed to find out about the increased sales. Although it's likely this increase is due to their near abandonment of their original and most hideous design. They've diversified, presumably asking their designers for something "less revolting this time". And if this is the case, then we at IHateCrocs are actually getting through after years of lobbying and protesting. That said, one billion dollars in sales certainly suggests too many fools with money.

When did you found IHateCrocs and why?

IHateCrocs was founded on July 21, 2006 when I registered the domain. Though what brought me to that point was a growing discomfort on my part to the strange, creeping parasitic quality of Crocs and my realization that I couldn't be the only person in the world immune to the disease. More specifically, the first time I ever saw a pair of Crocs, I was in a high school class with my friend Matt and we saw a classmate wearing them. We had no idea why any person would wear such things and we laughed about how terrible-looking they were. Soon, within a matter of weeks, I was seeing Crocs on people's feet all through the halls of my school. And within a month, my friend Matt had a pair of Crocs. It was incredible to see. He said, "They're comfortable." I've tried Crocs on. I don't find them particularly comfortable.

What is about Crocs that makes your blood boil?

That it took over my friends like a zombie virus made my blood boil. I can honestly say that I see fewer and fewer Crocs all the time, unless they're Crocs in disguise (the aforementioned less revolting models), so they haven't made my blood boil in quite some time. I don't see my friends in Crocs anymore, either.

How is it then that everyone from cliched soccer moms to Brad Pitt can't stop wearing them?

That question is very stymieing. I suppose if we knew, we'd have a vaccine by now. I suspect the answer is laziness and the perception of comfort. We've seen pajama pants and sweatpants in the grocery as a result of laziness, and what could be easier and lazier to do than to slip on a pair of Crocs? With Crocs, you don't even need the fine motor skills involved in threading the thong of a flip-flop between your toes.

If Brad Pitt is wearing Crocs, it's a cry for help.


*****

I Hate Crocs store is here.

Junior Pigeon is here.

Hello NY Times readers

Welcome.

I rarely update this site anymore, but I'm always doing new things at my website located on the Internet here.

I also have a travel blog and miscellaneous ridiculous thing blog called Junior Pigeon.

You can also follow me on Twitter here.





For the IHATECROCS store, go HERE.

Years of blog posts are archived for your reading pleasure below. Thanks for visiting.

Our Legacy

Crocs, as a company, really does try. You have to give them that, if nothing else – they honestly, sincerely want you to put on their shoes. They promise customers that the feeling of slipping one on is incomparable and that Crocs may just be the most comfortable shoes ever invented. They'd really rather you not mention the fact that they may simultaneously be the ugliest. Just try them on. They swear you'll never want to take them off, so long as you don't look down.

It's a fine goal, to be sure, but there are more holes in that logic than in the shoes themselves. There's no getting around the simple fact that Crocs are ugly. It is a truth universally acknowledged. Even the most deluded Crocs lover will concede this point, though they will invariably swap the word ‘ugly’ for ‘quirky’ or ‘unusual’. Regardless, the end result is the same: these people know that the footwear they don is unattractive. They are large, chunky, lurid and punctured with holes. They are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs.

They're not even tolerably ugly like cheap flip-flops or Birkenstocks. They're blaringly, violently distasteful and while most trends of such an obviously unfashionable nature don't tend to survive for exceptionally long, Crocs have. They've spread like an infection to the furthest reaches of the globe. People, for no discernible reason whatsoever, are dying to get their hands on the most unsightly footwear imaginable. Consumers worldwide are abandoning their dignity and going out on the town in their neon orange – or pink, or blue, or yellow – Crocs.

The question remains: why does anyone wear these Crocs? It can be chalked up to mass insanity, but if one were to ask the average Crocs fan why they wear them, they will undoubtedly answer, “Because they’re extremely comfortable,” repeating the same argument that goaded them into trying the monstrosities on in the first place. These Crocs people truly believe that this is reason enough to wear these hideous shoes. Following this logic, they must believe that going to the market wearing only their underwear or a bathrobe and slippers is just as acceptable.

The most disturbing aspect is that the level of comfort that can be gained from a pair of Crocs is minimal at best. The rubber-like substance that the Crocs are made from sticks to the sole of your foot like hot tar and the strange friction of the shoe against the ground makes it nearly impossible to walk normally, resulting in the unflatteringly named ‘Croc-walk.’ It is particularly noticeable when attempted by children.

However, reminiscent of cultists, Crocs fans will defend their shoes to the bitter end, never giving in to reason and never offering an explanation that can be backed up with supporting arguments. It’s as if these people do not know how to defend Crocs and cannot put into words why they are so enthusiastic about them. None of these people have anyone nearby telling them to change into respectable shoes; everyone around them is usually wearing Crocs, too. It starts with one member of a community and infiltrates the closets of neighbours, friends and children. Soon, everyone is wearing the shoes that only months ago, they all were mocking. It's quiet, it's subtle, and it sneaks up without warning, but soon entire regions become infected. The sane find themselves suddenly in the minority, standing up to such a monumental threat to good taste. They are brave, they are righteous, and they are not alone.













Click here to visit the IHATECROCS store.

Keep up the good fight.

IMMOVABLE OBJECT VS. UNSTOPPABLE FORCE: ROCK PAPER SCISSORS EDITION

Hello, I would just like to share with you the latest video we've put up at Junior Pigeon Dot Com. Laura and I (Vincenzo) have discovered that we are evenly matched in our Rock Paper Scissors prowess. Neither can beat the other. This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object:

branching out - i hate fashion

This is the new 'oversized ringer see thru t-shirt' by American Apparel. It unfortunately doesn't come with the moustache; you must supply your own. I do believe this shirt requires a moustache for the proper accessorizing. Observe how the brown of the moustache and the brown of the shirt complement each other. I find this image emotionally moving.

The cost is $26.00. The shirt is backordered. It is an incredibly popular item. If only the Snuggy/Slanket people thought to make their products 'see thru.'

A perfect companion to your yellow or brown Crocs.

Junior Pigeon Dot Com

I get quite a few emails from people who ask me why I'd spend "so much time" on a website that is negative. The truth is, I don't spend very much time on this website. But back when I started IHATECROCS, it was definitely needed. For my own sanity.

I'm sure I've told the tale before, but the origin of IHATECROCS is as follows: I was in high school. I had lived a Croc-free existence for my entire life. Suddenly, into the room walks someone wearing Crocs. My friend Matt pointed out to me the ridiculousness of the shoe. But, they were only being worn by that one weird guy in the class, so I thought nothing of it. We made fun of the shoes because they were so bizarre and ugly. Some time passed.

More people started wearing them. It was very strange. Like a virus or an outbreak of zombies. It was spreading. People in my group of friends started wearing them. And then... one day... Matt got a pair. Matt, the guy who had been making fun of Crocs with me. The guy who pointed them out to me! He was wearing a pair of black Crocs. I didn't understand. I had to know there were other sane people in the world. I started up IHATECROCS and that's how you come to be looking at these words.

All of this is just a roundabout way of letting you know that I have another site and it's not about hating things. It's called Junior Pigeon Dot Com and my girlfriend and I started it as an outlet for our various projects and hijinx. So, check it out! We're going to do cool things!

The MacKenzie / Ravina Memorial Toaster from Junior Pigeon on Vimeo.

This post has been brought to you by a kindly sponsor

Today's post is brought to you by the good people at BuyItRightHere.co.uk -- where comfort meets fashion, apparently. But we'll get back to that in a bit!

In the meantime, we have everyone's favourite thing: HATEMAIL! Now with personal attacks!

This is from our good friend Jason Patrick:

Sorry, I just can't comprehend your blog or your personal fetish regarding Crocs. I'm happy to see their economic recovery and expansion succeed, since the global economy needs all the help it can get....but do you even have any clue at all regarding your complaints? Are you even remotely aware of the fact that the company has hundreds of different styles of shoes, and all but the basic model don't look anything like the particular model you appear to detest? The company makes very good-looking shoes for many people, including some more stylish women's shoes in particular; and employs a few thousand people globally - don't you think there are better things in this world to hate? I'm just curious what particular mental defect causes someone to spend this much energy attacking what other people choose to wear - exactly why is this SO offensive and upsetting for you? I'm sure you have plenty of mommy issues (or daddy issues) or whatever else, are you really going to spend your free time getting upset about other people's footwear? Good luck with the journalism career though, I certainly hope future employers don't chance upon your poorly written and even-more-poorly researched 'blog' during your job search.

Dear Jason:

1. I find it odd that you are unable to comprehend this blog. It's a fairly simple concept. It is called 'I Hate Crocs' and it is for people who hate Crocs. Simple!

2. Oh, I see. You don't understand what we mean by 'Crocs.' That's fair enough. You're correct, that company does have many types of shoes. To specify, this website is against their ugly model. The luridly coloured Swiss cheese clog-footwear.

3. Further, I am unsure which part of this website you find 'poorly researched.' Near as I can tell, there's no real research involved. Jason, if you are interested in my journalistic work, which involves research and interviews, you can go to Vincenzo Ravina Dot Com.

4. Finally, just a nitpicky thing: you put the word 'blog' in quotes, as though questioning the legitimacy of this website's claim to be a blog. I find this odd. That's all.

We thank Jason truly, for taking the time to write.

Next, we have an email from Fergus Travers:

I seriously think you have a problem. I too think crocs are ugly as shit but I wear them indoors and around my land but I don't go as far as making a fucking website and selling shirts saying "they are to your eyes like second hand smoke is to your lungs". At least think of something better than that shit. You want to retire early... the group of people who created crocs can retire or probably have retired and are living in amazing houses and driving sweet cars, you are a very sad person and I do feel sorry for you and your friend who made this lump of shit of a site, you're obviously both rejected and turn towards hating crocs and selling fucked up t-shirts for money... I'm sorry but there is something wrong with you.

Dear Fergus Travers,

Awesome name!

Love,

Vincenzo


In any case, as a special treat, each of our hatemailers today (Both Fergus and Jason) will be getting $30 credits at BuyItRightHere.co.uk. Yes, they will get $30 off whatever they purchase on the website of our kindly sponsors.

BUT I know what you're saying. You're saying, 'Vincenzo, why do the hatemailers get rewarded with $30 credits at the awesome website that is sponsoring this post? We actually like your site and don't send you terrible hatemail. How dare you, Vincenzo? How dare you?'

Well, we've anticipated this reaction. We've got a $30 credit for everyone. Up to 100 of you, anyway. Just type in the following code when you order: 515IHATE

See? Easy. Also, you're probably wondering what that site sells. They sell Ugg Boots. And as far as I know, they are the only site on the internet that sells Ugg Boots.

Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, 'Vincenzo, are you ENDORSING Ugg Boots?'

And to that, I would respond, 'No.'

But this is what Naomi at BuyItRightHere.co.uk had to say: "Fashion in my mind brings so much more to life if it can be therapeutic and healthy. Often comfort and fashion clash and we sacrifice our sanity to fit into the size 6 dress and live with the blisters from new heels."

And here is a list of things that Ugg Boots can probably do for you:

• Keep your feet dry
• Keep your feet wet (if you fill the boots with water before putting them on)
• Kill a Cornish game hen (if you throw the boot at the Cornish game hen)
• MUCH much more.
  

Now, I know that some of you have been having trouble with your Cornish game hens. We here at IHATECROCS are here to help. That coupon code again is 515IHATE.

Act now. You have two weeks. And yes, that is a threat.

Click here.

The preceding has been our first attempt at paid advertising. How'd we do?

Let us know at ihatecrocs@gmail.com